Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Tabloid Tuesday: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Even if you’re a new comer to the classical scene, I know you know who Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is. He has been called the most universal composer in the history of Western music. And with a name like that how could he not be destined for greatness?

His earliest compositions were written when he was five. It’s not like he wrote the requiem at this point (in fact the Requiem is the last piece he wrote), but that’s still an impressively young age for the short simple pieces he wrote at that time.

He was an eager and affectionate young man, but also very proud and ambitious. He only liked to play for people who took music seriously.

His father paraded him around Europe showing off his musical talents, much like the pageant mothers of the 21st century but without the spray tan and wigs… well maybe the wigs. He toured to prestigious venues all over the continent at a young age and wowed nobles everywhere he went.

Though he didn’t have any formal schooling, he learned Latin at a young age, then Italian and later some French and English. He also had a fondness for arithmetic, demonstrated by his mathematical doodlings.

He married Constanze Weber in 1782. Their relationship appears to have been very affectionate and dedicated, though initially opposed by his father who wanted his son to focus solely on his music.

This brilliant man went on to write masterpiece after masterpiece. By the time of his death he had composed over 600 pieces, though the exact number is unknown due to misappropriations and some things which may have been lost, and some which were incomplete.

Alright. Have I made it sufficiently clear that Mozart was an absolutely genius composer who had the greatest of influence on generations to come?

Good. I don’t want any of that to be depreciated by what I tell you next. Because really, we all have our own quirks in our personal lives.

As many young people do, Mozart just loved silly, gross things. He commonly corresponded with his female cousin, Maria Anna Thekla, by letter in simple rhyming verse.

This was not the verse of children’s rhymes, or sonnet, ballad, or ode. Nope. These were bawdy rhymes featuring flatulence and defecation (on various body parts and items of furniture).

He also corresponded in a like manner with his mother, who thought it was a jolly old time and wrote back similarly. I won’t actually post the lyrics to the songs he wrote (sometimes in canon form) on the theme, nor snippets from the letters he wrote. However, if you don’t believe me or need a good laugh, please, Google it.

I want to reiterate that I no less respect Mozart as an artist and great mind. It just goes to show that even the most brilliant among us have oddities.

Actually, the things he wrote are quite funny, if in the most juvenile way possible. It just shows that this great artist still had a sense of humor about him after being showcased like a prize pig by his father, and furiously turning out one masterpiece after another.


You can hear the more professional music written by this great mind performed by the Kingston Symphony this season in Mozart & Beethoven (December 1st), Brahms, Mozart & Elgar (March 2nd), and Mozart’s Requiem (March 23rd). 

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